


Do Not Go Far From Me

by rosalindstars



Category: Warrior Nun (TV)
Genre: A little humor as a treat, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Major Character Death but it's not explicitly shown but it still happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:15:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25322998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosalindstars/pseuds/rosalindstars
Summary: All they could do was keep going. She'd want them to.And maybe, she'd see them succeed.
Relationships: Sister Beatrice/Ava Silva
Comments: 52
Kudos: 285





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a prompt by FreeGrain  
> Beta'd by ambassador319  
> Shoutout to the Future Warrior Nuns Discord for enabling me, you're the best

**Today**

The portal warped and shimmered in front of them. Jillian’s hands clenched around her tablet, knuckles white with what Beatrice could only guess was grief. She knew what that felt like, to be confronted with the very thing that ruined her life and to have to use it on purpose. For Jillian, it was the portal that took Michael and now stood like a banner waving in the breeze in the center of the room. 

For Beatrice, it was the sword that took Ava. Strapped to Lilith’s back, glowing brighter than a meteor shower. 

Lilith’s hands hung limply at her sides while she stared into the portal. Her hair, a deep gray in between her natural shade and the strange silver she’d brought back from Hell, curtained her face from view. 

Beatrice recalled, faintly, washing her hands over and over when they came back to the Cradle the night the stars stopped shining. Logically speaking, the stars hadn’t gone out. She knew that. But Ava had taken every bit of light that God had ever created with her. Beatrice scrubbed until her skin was raw, not noticing the sting of her tears as they spilled onto her palms. Or maybe she did notice, but her mind couldn’t bring itself to care. Mary had found them that first night, her and Camila and Lilith all shaking and curled up next to each other on the floor next to Ava’s bed.

The days that followed were a haze that peeled into foggy months of chasing Adriel and Vincent and killing demons. She flexed her hands involuntarily. They still felt sticky and warm, coated with Ava’s blood. If she closed her eyes she could see Ava’s face, pale and perfect looking up at her with that goddamn smile crinkling the corners of her eyes. Beatrice didn’t close her eyes that much anymore. She didn’t sleep much anymore, either. 

“What are we waiting for?” Camila gripped the smooth black briefcase that held the Halo. 

Lilith smiled. “Nothing, I guess. Let’s go.” And with that she stepped forwards and through the portal. Mary rolled her shoulders and went in next. 

Camila turned to Beatrice. She held her free hand out. “We’re right with you, okay?”

Her smile didn’t waver when Beatrice looked down at her with blank features. She didn’t say anything (because whatever she said wouldn’t find a cheeky reply, not anymore). Beatrice carefully grasped Camila’s hand and they walked into the portal together. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Two Months Ago**

Ava knew she didn’t have much in the way of sensible ideas, but even she had to admit that this one was a bit of overkill. Which she did, by yelling “WHAT THE FUCK, BRO” at the top of her lungs as the Tarask hurled her across the room.

“AVA, WE ARE IN A CHURCH.” Beatrice tore a pistol out of some masked assailant’s hand and whipped it at his temple with a loud crack. _God, she’s hot_. Ava didn’t have time to admire her girlfriend (God, what a miracle it was to call Beatrice her girlfriend) because the Tarask was storming its way up the aisle at her. She ran and dove under its legs, sliding across the floor and taking a wild swing at the wraith demon possessing the now unconscious man. 

“I KNOW WE’RE IN A CHURCH, I CENSORED MYSELF!” Ava whirled around and lopped off the Tarask’s arm before it could scoop her off the floor again. “I SAID BRO!” 

“SHE MEANT THE OTHER WORD.” Lilith rasped, clawing at the guy pinning her arm behind her until he let go. Across the room, Mary crouched so Camila could run and leap off of her back, lodging arrows into more bad guys’ limbs. 

“WHICH WORD?” Ava managed to wedge her sword into the Tarask’s chest, watching it scream back into Hell before she felt a sharp pain in her side. “FUCK!” A thin dagger poked out. 

“YEAH THAT ONE NOW STOP SAYING IT!” Beatrice shouted from the other end of the room while knocking someone else out with a well placed palm strike. As the quiet spread over them, the battle now over, they regrouped in the center. Ava felt a hand rest on her shoulder as Beatrice noticed the knife. She held up a hand to stop the nun, and wrenched the dagger out. Ava wiped it off on her pants leg and held it out. 

“Here, got you something. For your collection.” 

She grinned until the furrow between Beatrice’s eyebrows softened. There was something in her eyes, a gleam that Ava had grown to love, a set to her features that froze Ava in place. She took the knife and turned it over, examining it. 

“Thanks,” she said with a light smile that made Ava’s heart swoop around and do a barrel roll. “You sure know how to treat a girl.” Beatrice wiped a spot of blood off of Ava’s cheek, kissed her soundly and headed for the exit with Camila in tow. Mary and Lilith both nudged Ava’s shoulders as they walked past, smiling at something Ava couldn’t make out. She felt every atom of skin that had come in contact with Beatrice glow with warmth. She shook off her stupor and followed them out. She couldn’t believe this was her life. Heaven had nothing on this. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Two Weeks Ago**

_God, please, tell me that this time I got into Heaven._ Lilith’s eyes cracked open slowly. Heaven … looked a lot like a field of moving blurs? She closed her eyes, counted to 5, and opened them again. 

Mother Superion looked down at her, crying. Well, that couldn’t possibly be good. “You’re awake,” she broke into a strange half laugh, half sob. “Thank God.” 

“What happened? Where’s everyone else?” Lilith’s tongue felt like a burlap sack bulging with stones. But as soon as she registered the pain radiating through her body, it was gone. She sat up. Camila was next to Mother Superion by Lilith’s right side. Her eyes were red and puffy. Mary was across from her. She didn’t seem too surprised that Lilith had woken up. She set down the towel she’d been using to wipe blood off of her face and smoothed a stray lock of hair away from Lilith’s forehead. Mary smiled softly. 

“Ava… she’s gone. Gave up the Halo to save you.” 

The memories hit Lilith like a wave. Adriel, ambushing them in the night. A sharp, searing pain as he ran her through with Ava’s sword (Lilith knew it was his first but he was also a thief and a betrayer and Lilith had no respect for either). Brief flashes of Ava and Adriel fighting. Then Ava, crawling towards her clutching the Halo in her fingers like it didn’t burn with the might of God. They sported matching wounds in their torsos where Adriel had stabbed them. Her face was set with a determination and severity Lilith didn’t know Ava was even capable of. Ava’s face, hovering above her. 

“She said,” Lilith was sobbing for no apparent reason, “She said I was a better warrior. She said that it was payback. For saving her life.” She scowled suddenly. “That bitch! Always getting the last word in.” She felt an itch on her spine and reached to scratch it. 

Camila sniffled. “Don’t speak ill of the dead.” Lilith heard her saying words but didn’t register them. All she could think about was the faint scar beneath her fingers, a perfect circle of raised flesh on her back. It was the Halo. 

She was meant to be a Warrior Nun. That’s what she’d been told, all her life. Her mother handed her a dagger for her 4th birthday and taught her how to hold it before letting her have any cake. Lilith had wanted the Halo since she first read a story of her ancestors wielding it in battle. She’d never wanted anything more. Now it rested between her shoulder blades, backlighting her with holy fire. 

No one had ever warned her it would feel this heavy. 

But if Lilith had the Halo, then Ava….

 _Don’t speak ill of the dead._ Lilith finally heard what Camila had said, and the weight of it ripped a animal cry out of her chest. 

Beatrice was a few feet away, hunched over a body lying on the ground. Oh, God. Oh, God, please, no. Lilith scrambled to her feet and she felt that warping that came with her teleportation powers. She was at Beatrice’s side in an instant. _What the fuck?_ Every thought flew from her mind like a flock of spooked birds when she saw Ava, pale and bloody and oh so still. Her knees gave out. Beatrice was almost as still as Ava. Save for the barely restrained shake of her shoulders. Lilith carefully reached over Ava and pressed her hand to Beatrice’s cheek. 

And at this point Ava’s eyes would open. She was just sleeping. She’d butt in with some snarky comment about how Lilith should “keep your hands off my girlfriend”. She’d try her best to glare at Lilith the way Lilith used to glare at her when they first met. Or she’d make a pun and waggle her eyebrows at them. Beatrice would look at Ava like God taught her Himself how to make the stars shine. She’d roll her eyes with that fond smile that Lilith had only ever seen on her parents, who loved each other more than two hearts could handle. 

Ava should move. She should open that annoying mouth of hers and talk. God, Lilith wouldn’t even mind if Ava flipped her off with both hands. Lilith would never be mean to her again if she just fucking moved. 

Ava would move. She had to. Lilith couldn’t do this without her. 

Beatrice met Lilith’s eyes. Her voice was calm when she spoke. But unlike the calm that they’d all come to depend on, it was completely devoid of warmth. Cold as the open ocean racked with storms. 

“Make. Him. Pay.”

Lilith had never wanted anything more. 


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta'd by sigourneyreefer  
> 

**Today**

Beatrice had expected to feel something, anything, upon stepping through the portal. Maybe vertigo would set in, maybe her heart would palpitate or her eyes would dilate and the light would hurt to look at. But, predictably, she felt nothing at all. Camila let go of her hand to run and catch up to Mary and Lilith in the distance. Beatrice took a moment to look around. They were standing on a wide open field under an overcast sky. Everything, including the waving grass in a nonexistent wind, was gray and washed out. The air felt pleasantly warm, and Beatrice registered faintly that her hands didn’t feel strange anymore. She glanced down just to check. They were clean. Of course they were. She walked without thinking to the others, who had stopped about 50 feet ahead of her. Camila had set the suitcase down on the ground. The grass rippled around it. 

Lilith looked up at the sky, then down at the case. She turned her head left and the right, and then turned in a circle twice. “This… Something doesn’t feel right. This feels too quiet. This doesn’t feel like what-” Her voice caught, and she swallowed thickly before starting again. “This doesn’t feel like what I remember.” 

Mary rested her hand on Lilith’s back. “Maybe Jillian got it wrong, maybe we went to the wrong spot to drop off the Halo. We can go back, try again?” 

Camila shook her head. “No, we’re right where we need to be. See?” She pointed at the case, which had begun to glow like a miniature Sun. “I don’t think it’s supposed to be that bright, though.” 

Beatrice grabbed Camila’s arm and pulled her away as Mary and Lilith took a few steps back. “I don’t think that’s what’s supp-”

The case vanished. One moment it was there, almost blinding in its intensity, the next it was just. Gone. The grass swayed in the wind as if nothing had ever bent it down. 

Camila darted forwards, out of Beatrice’s grasp. She knelt down and picked something up. In her hands was a gnarled branch of a tree, blossoming with gentle white flowers. “Almonds,” Camila whispered. “Almond blossoms.” “But there aren’t any trees here,” Lilith wondered aloud. “How did it get here? Where did the Halo go?” Mary’s hands left Lilith’s back to reach towards her shotguns. 

And

Then,

A

Voice

That Beatrice had only heard in the kindest of her nightmares on the nights God was gracious enough to let her dream at all

A voice that set every dormant spark in her heart ablaze with holy fire like she was the bush Moses had found

Laughed from behind them all, back in the direction of the portal. 

Ava stood before them in a long white dress. She’d tied flowers around her waist like a belt, and there were matching flowers threaded in her hair. She smiled at them as if she’d seen them only moments before, as if she’d entered the portal with them and got sidetracked watching the clouds move. “There’s nothing to shoot, Mary, unless you wanna go after me again.” She rubbed at the back of her neck. “From the look on your face, I’m thinking you might want to?” Ava looked at Beatrice (and she felt every atom _ache_ at the way Ava’s eyes softened and traced her features, and she wanted to leap into Ava’s arms, fuck decorum, fuck courtesy, fuck every promise she’d made to God, fuck the fact that she was technically on a mission, she’d make a fool and a heathen of herself a million times just to feel Ava’s heartbeat again) and said “Bea, help me out here, I’m way outnumbered. Mary, Lilith, _and_ Camila? There’s no way I can take them on my own. I don’t have the Halo, I don’t have any powers, you gotta help me out.” 

Beatrice didn’t move a muscle. She pinched herself, hard, on her forearm. Waited for the sky to open up and the ground to crumble and to wake up in her bed or on the floor of Jillian’s lab or in Hell itself. Then her legs shifted forwards, her feet pushed off and she crashed into Ava like it was the only path she’d ever walked on. 

Ava’s arms came up to hold her and they spun around once, twice, three times before Beatrice felt another body collide with them and Lilith scooped them all off of the ground. Mary held onto the other side of their strange sandwich and Camila slapped into them a millisecond later, sending them tumbling to the grass. Someone was laughing. 

_Oh._ Beatrice was laughing, and then everyone was laughing and it sounded like a hymn. Lilith started shaking, and they all fell into racking sobs.

They stayed on the ground for a while, consoling each other until Camila stopped hiccuping. “I’m going to ask this on behalf of everyone, and I would like to ask God’s forgiveness first.” Beatrice guessed she’d sat up, but she couldn’t see anything with her face pressed into the slope where Ava’s neck met her shoulder. “Thank you. Okay. What the _FUCK_ , Ava?!?”

“LANGUAGE!” Lilith sputtered.

Mary must have elbowed Lilith, because she yelped from Lilith probably elbowing her back twice as hard. “Let the girl let off some steam, Lily, she’s been holding it together for the rest of us for months. 

Ava slowly sat up, pulling Beatrice up with her so she could look at Camila and hold onto Beatrice at the same time. Beatrice kept her face where it was, not caring if anyone could see the rosy blush on the back of her neck or the way her whole body still shook with silent tears. Ava’s chest trembled as she spoke. “Months? No, it can’t be. Months?”

“About 2 and a half.” Lilith spoke. 

“And Adriel?” 

“I killed him.” 

Ava chuckled. “Proud of you.” 

“I saved your life, you saved mine, I got revenge. You owe me, Ava.” Lilith sounded closer now, as if she’d moved even closer to them. Beatrice felt her hands rest on top of where Beatrice’s were fisted into Ava’s dress, knuckles white as the fabric from tension. 

Ava shrugged. “I’ll figure out something. Shall we get out of here?” She gently lifted Beatrice’s face away from her, so they could lock eyes. “What do you say? Can I take you home?”

Beatrice elected to ignore Ava’s attempt at flirting. “Sounds good to me.” She tore herself away from Ava to stand up. Ava stood up as well and Beatrice latched onto her again, gripping her hand like she’d vanish otherwise. The others surrounded them, and they made their way back to the portal holding onto each other like boats tied together in a stormy port. 

They all stepped through together. Jillian looked up from her seat. “You weren’t gone very long. Wait,” she leapt to her feet, “Ava? It can’t be.”

Ava smiled ruefully. “Before you ask, I looked for Michael. I don’t think we went to the same places. I couldn’t find him.” 

Jillian folded into herself briefly. She took a deep breath. “I understand. It’s good to have you back, at least.”

Ava squeezed Beatrice’s hand. It was a promise without words. “It’s good to be back.” 

**One Week Later**

Ava felt two things upon waking up. The first was a thin stripe of sunlight draped across her face. She savored the warmth against her cheeks. The second feeling was that her legs were comfortably numb. A younger, far more different Ava would have panicked at the tingling sensation on her thighs. But Ava knew better now. She twisted out of Beatrice’s ever dependable grip and turned to face her sleeping form. Beatrice stirred, and for a brief moment Ava thought she woke her girlfriend up. She didn’t move. Ava lifted up Beatrice’s right hand into the sunlight. She gently turned it this way and that, kissing every little scar and freckle and callous she found. The hand currently laid flat against Ava’s back flexed and began to move up and down her spine. Ava tore her eyes away from Beatrice’s fingertips to meet her gaze. Beatrice had a soft look in her eyes. She pressed on Ava’s back to bring them closer. Ava’s eyes shut on their own accord, waiting for their lips to connect. But all Beatrice did was latch onto Ava’s body again, pulling her chest in and pillowing her face on Ava’s shoulder. Her right hand slipped out of Ava’s grasp to wrap around her. Ava sighed, only half disappointed. She ran her hands through Beatrice’s soft hair, smoothing out the tangles. Beatrice smiled, her lips pressing onto a faint smudge of lipstick left over from last night. 

“G’mornng,” Bea mumbled. “Waz you doing?” 

Ava loved every version of Beatrice she knew. But dorky morning Bea, when her eloquence was gone and her accent got all thick and raspy, was possibly her favorite. “I’m sorry for waking you up. My legs fell asleep,” she answered as she pulled back to face her favorite angel. 

Beatrice blinked slowly. She thought to herself for a moment, then curled back into Ava’s arms. “Makes sense. G’night.”

Ava held a laugh in her chest and closed her eyes with a smile. “Aren’t you missing morning prayers right now?”

Beatrice poked her stomach. “Stop laughing. And no I’m not. Already told God I was taking a day off.”

Ava gasped in mock-horror. “I don’t think God will particularly like that.” 

Bea leaned back, eyes glittering. “Then you’ll have to fight Him for me. I deserve a very long rest after marching into Heaven to bring you back to life. It’s a lot of work, being this incredible.” Ava kissed Bea’s nose. “Lucky me, then, getting to love someone like you.”

The morning light had spread across the room. They settled into each other’s embrace without a care in the world. Ava was so very lucky, indeed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! I've got a lot of much softer one-shots planned, so be on the lookout for that. Reading your comments and getting such a positive response means the world to me, so thank you for all the kind words.


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